Adopting a Boy

I have gotten a bunch of questions and comments recently about adopting a boy. Most people say, "A boy? That's very unusual for China" or other other (more offensive) things. Most people don't realize how much international adoption has changed since our first adoption (prior to that, actually). When we first started thinking about adoption, the wait time from application to travel for the China NSN program was about 6-12 months. By the time we submitted our paperwork (right after we got married, in late 2006), the wait had increased to two years. If we had not switched to the special needs program in February, 2007, we would still be waiting for a referral from China (we would probably wait about four more years--8 years in total). I don't want to give the impression that we changed programs to avoid a long wait. It just didn't make sense to wait when so many children (like our sweet Nora!) were languishing.

Since we adopted Nora, the China program has effectively become a special needs adoption program. There have always been a high number of children with special needs waiting to be adopted in China--not only is there great stigma associated with special needs, but many families simply do not have the resources to care for their children with special needs. But with an improved economy in China, and domestic adoption on the rise, the proportion of SN children in orphanages has increased dramatically. Since special needs occur in as many boys as girls (if not more), about 50% of babies abandoned in China are boys. And, because 70% of adoptive families want to adopt a girl, the vast majority of the children left waiting (and waiting) in orphanages are boys. Some of these boys have relatively minor special needs--their greatest need really is their gender. The acronym/term used by agencies and adoptive parents is "AYAP girl" or "as young as possible girl." This is what most parents specify in their adoption applications.

We would have been happy either way. But I have to admit, I wanted a little bit of "boy" in my life :-) because I think everyone should get that experience.

I came across this video today, on the Love Without Boundaries website. If you can watch this without tearing up, you're a stronger person than I am.



If that doesn't make you want to bring home a boy, I can't help you.

Can't wait to meet our sweet little guy!